Splatter Guard

Maddie prepared us well for our second child.

A few weeks after Maddie was born, Maddie sneezed while being changed, and shot poo in a nifty little arch six feet onto the furniture in her buttwardly directly.  She did this more than once.  It prompted us to build a splatter guard to protect the furniture and stuff “south” of her.  We never forgot the experience, and before Aaron was even born, we put a splatter guard on his changing table.

Poo Shield

Now, Aaron’s splatter guard (item “A” in the picture above) has already saved our furniture a little.  But not from the same thing.  It turns out that Boys have more than one way of ruining furniture from the changing table.  Aaron hasn’t yet sneezed while we’re holding his legs up for a changing (and aiming his butt at a 15 degree angle).  But he has peed.  A lot.  In all sorts of directions.  And while the splatter guard does help in one general direction, you also need an absorbent cloth to cover the little dude’s hose.

So anybody out there having a little boy would do well to take note:  In addition to the splatter guard you need for either gender,  (And you do need it.)  (Ours is made from cardboard, aluminum foil, and a cotton t-shirt outer layer.) you need item “B” in the picture above, something to cover the boy’s weapon, because it can fire at any time.

At least we had the splatter guard in place when Aaron arrived.  We learned our lesson from our experience with Maddie.

Who We Were Then
  • David
  • Lillian
  • Maddie (2 years old)
  • Aaron (0 years old)